My Morning Ritual

For some reason, when I am on the 7 train in the morning on my way to work, I always start thinking about incredibly serious crap--life, death, God, the war, people I haven't seen in ages, my childhood, whatever. This never happens on the way home--I suppose because I am too tired, and also I usually take a different route home, so I am on the 7 train longer in the morning than in the evening.

Maybe I'm just trying to distract myself from the constant poopy smell? Maybe the poopy smell that I smell everytime I get on the train is just my brain's way of expressing to me that I think the 7 line is a piece of crap and there really is no poopy smell? I've just convinced myself that there is a poopy smell, so I automatically smell it everyday after being on the train for approximately one minute? It sure makes me miss the maple syrup smell that we got a few times in Manhattan, though!

That's what I was wondering this morning, so maybe not all my thoughts are that serious, huh?

I used to write every day. Not really important or serious stuff, but sometimes I would really be happy with whatever I had done. There was some poetry that I thought was decent, not too self-indulgent, and also some essays that I was pleased about. In college I tried to write a novel, and it was crap, but at least it had my brain in use, practicing my skill. Actually, it was my second novel if I count that NKOTB thing I wrote when I was 13 or so (which, if I ever did become a famed writer, would be pretty funny tp publish one day). But nowadays, I don't write much anymore at all. And I still think I get really good ideas for things sometimes, but it's as if I've forgotten how to properly execute them. Or maybe I was never that good at the actual writing, and I was just better with the ideas? If that's the case I should probably write for a soap opera or something. I guess I could always go back and try my hand at a Harlequin romance, just to get back in the habit of doing it daily.